How to build happy and healthy relationship between you and your kid with special needs By: Elaine Iwa

Have you ever felt unappreciated when you called your child but he/she didn’t look at you? As much as you want to make your little angel feel loved, the response you get from him/her makes you feel that there is a disconnection between the both of you.

As a parent, it may seem frustrating to see your child like this. You may also feel as if you cannot do something to make him understand what is happening around him. But believe me when I say that you can! There is a way! In fact, a lot of ways!

It’s never too late for parents to build happy and healthy relationships with their children with special needs. Don’t know where to start? Here are some things you can consider in establishing a connection with your child:

1. Make time – Time is an important element in a man’s life. We can never reverse the clock and bring back what has gone. This is why parents should spend time with their children while they are still young. Spend at least 3-4 hours per day to bond with your child. Build a connection by playing with your kid. Join him/her in things he/she loves doing. Frequently call your child by his/her name. Always remember to make your child feel important.

2.Observe your child - Discover what makes your child happy and what makes him do unnecessary behaviors. List every possible thing that catches his/her attention, even those that frustrates him/her. Take note of your child’s reaction on different situations. With this, you will understand your child better. Look for possible ways on how you can make your presence be felt. For instance, instead of letting your child watch nursery videos, you can try being animated by imitating his/her favorite characters. You can also sing his/her favorite nursery songs.

3. Ask for support – Do a research. Watch videos. Read books, articles and documents about children with special needs. Seek support. There are different organizations and professionals who can enlighten and help you cope with your situation. Also, look for a support group. Always remember that you are not alone. There are parents like you who are doing everything for their child. With their experience and insights, they can help you understand and strengthen your relationship with your child, as well as share with you tips on how to manage your child when he/she is exhibiting disruptive behaviors. But the best way to handle your child is to just allow your love to calm the storm. Let your love transcend in your child. Nothing beats love.

4. Appreciate the small victories - Sometimes, when you get blinded by the negative things that your child is doing, you feel hopeless and frustrated. But don’t forget to focus on the good things. Appreciate even the smallest achievements of your child. When he smiles at you or hug you spontaneously, when he look into your eyes even just for a second or when he sits down properly – these are some of the things you should be thankful for. Have a positive attitude and you will live a happy life with your child.
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5. Celebrate your child’s uniqueness – Do not compare your child to others. There is something in your child that makes him/her uniquely wonderful and amazing. Acceptance is what he/she needs. Your child is awesome and capable of doing great things – celebrate life together!